Pain Forever
by hmw95
Summary: Raph makes a mistake that will change his life and take Leo's forever. When a time traveler comes, will Raph fix it? Will Leo want to be saved? RAPH AND LEO CENTRIC!
1. Chapter 1

1I don't know how much of this I can take anymore. I mean, I'm supposed to be strong for my brothers. You know how the wise men say, "One who shoulders the weight of the world will be crushed under the world's weight"? Well, I keep trying to take the weight away but my younger siblings keep piling it higher. If I don't escape soon, I am starting to think that I might be that person to be crushed. It's always 'Leo's so perfect' or 'Leo is needs a life' or even 'Leo just needs to go and die!" Well, I couldn't agree more with the last one. That's what I've wanted for a while now, to just be free and weightless. My sensei thinks he knows me and understands me. He could never be any more wrong. No one understands me, and Mikey thinks he's misunderstood. I could laugh at that. Donny thinks he understands me, but I tell him my leader problems. Not Leonardo problems. The one who probably understands me most is Raph. Although I know he hates me too much to admit he is even close to being like me. I swear, with all the fights we get into these days, one of us is going to get hurt. I kind of hope he is the one to hurt me. I'd do anything for my brothers to be unharmed. Even if it means my death.

I made a few boxes of random things, just in case something happens and I meet death. I put letters in each of them, showing how much I care… even if they resent me. I threw some pictures and CDs in them too. I put my start of know technology in Donny's box, a small gadget I built myself, and works perfect. I put my family photo album in Mikey's box. It only has a few pictures of me in the album, but mostly, it is them. I love that album, because all of the pictures of me are me. Not Fearless Leader. A couple of drawings that me, Leonardo drew is in Splinter's. They are mostly the New York skyline and my katanas. But Raph's… I put my most prized possession in his, to help him understand. And no, I didn't put my katanas in his box. That is the Leader's prized possession. Mine is my journal. It has my most inner thoughts… Like how I used to think that Shredder will kill me. I still think it. I just know that we could maybe defeat him again…but Shredder hates me even more than Splinter and just wants to stab his gauntlet into my chest himself. Why doesn't he just go ahead?

Yeah, Shredder. If you're reading this, I am waiting.


	2. Pain, Without Love

1Raph POV

"Raph! You're overreacting!" Leo yelled at me. He's da one who was on my shell during the trip back from fighting some purple dragons... No surprise there. But Leo was freakin' out ova nuthin'!

"Leo! STOP LECTURING ME! Nuthin' went wrong, so stop gettin' on my shell!" I shouted back. Leo's so annoyin'!

"You could've gotten killed tonight! What if Karai came back and..." Leo started but I cut im' off.

"Just because you're perfect doesn't mean I have to be too! Besides, if it was Karai, you'd fight YOUR girlfriend..." By then I knew I said too much. Leo lunged at me.

"STOP!" We hear. Splinter is ova by the door to da lair. "Raphael, retire to your room. I must speak with Leonardo." I left, but not entirely. I hid behind a pillar to eavesdrop.

"Sensei... Why? Why do I have to be the leader? Why do I have to protect this family ewhen they only resent me?" Leo asked. I took a peek over and saw hurt in his eyes. Now, that's rare.

"It is your duty as eldest to..." But Splinter was cut off.

"Why do I have to do all of that? Why can't I be my own person? You don't even know me! Did you know that I draw? That I've always wanted to play guitar? Did you?" Leo blurted out.

"I'm afraid not... My son." Splinter replied.

"I'm tired of being called all of those names! Fearless Leader, Perfect, Splinter Junior! It hurts Sensei. I just want to be ME, Leonardo. Is that too much to ask for?" Leo finished, tears in his eyes. After that, he bumped Splinter out of the way and ran into the dark sewers. Tears snaked down Sensei's cheeks. I then snuck into the sewers to find my big brother.


	3. Pain, I can't get enough

1Leo POV

I ran and ran as fast as I could. Before I knew it, I was in Central Park. When I don't come back tomorrow, Sensei or Mike will probably look through my room and find the CDs and drawings I made for them. I hope death takes me soon. I _did_ make that stuff so that I wouldn't be unprepared for my fall. Oh god I loved them.

Suddenly, I turn my back to see that Raph was in the shadows.

"Why-why didn't you tell us bro?" Raph asked. I felt warm tears form in my eyes.

"Go away Raph." I said, coldly. God, this is annoying!

"You're so stubborn! I hate your personality, the way you always get on my case even though I am trying to help you… Ya know what? I HATE YOU!" Raph yelled. He attacked me, full force. But I couldn't hurt him. He's my brother. Raph may hate me, but not a part of me hates him. Then he kicked me, sending me lying on my shell, defenseless. He pulled out his sais. Before I could move, he was above me and a sai was stabbed in me. It was deep, under the left side of my collarbone. Dangerously close to my heart.

I know that I wanted to be murdered… So my brothers wouldn't find me hanging with a noose around my neck or a cup of rat poison in my hand. But, I didn't expect my murderer to be my brother and best friend, Raphael.


	4. I like it rough

1Raph POV

No… I did NOT just do that… But I did. My eyes widened and I backed away, already feeling salty tears snake their way down my cheeks. I saw blood begin to ooze out of the wound, and I felt really sick. I kneeled down next to him and used one of my knee pads to try to stop the bleeding.

"Raph… I'm sorry…" Leo says, pained. What? Sorry?

"Leo, it should be me to say sorry…"

"No. I-I made you resent me… Just remember I… never… hated…you. I-I love you R-Raph." Leo said, choking out the last words between shallow breaths. That's when I realized… he's dyin' here. Tears fell down my face and dripped onto his bleeding plastron.

"I love you too bro… But don't leave me here!" I said. I felt his weak, shakin' hand grip both of mine, which were still keeping pressure on the wound.

"Never…" He whispered. But the pain and blood loss started to get to him.

"Ra-Raph… When you g-get home l-look under m-my bed. You'll understand me t-then." His eyes shut to try and take away the pain.

"I will Leo. Do- do you hate me now? Was that stuff you told Splinter true?"

"Oh… 'Course… N-never hated y-you ev-ever." He whispered to me, his eyes still closed. His breathing slowed and I feared the worst. I looked down with tears brimming my eyes, but he spoke again. 

"N-never your f-fault… L-love all y-you. S-sorry…" Leo whispered. Minutes of silence went by, then suddenly, the grip on my hand loosened and the warm tickle of breath on my leg stopped. I hugged his limp, lifeless body to my own. My big brotha is dead 'cause of me. I sat there, bawling my eyes out, still holding his dead body for hours. I will never get to hear one of his lectures, see those unique spirit filled sapphire eyes. I will never see a memory of him… unless it's this. Me killin' 'im. After two long hours, I realized that I need to head home. Home. It will never, ever be the same. 


	5. Worries Fulfilled

A/N: Okay, no more song quotes for chapters! Sorry!

Mikey POV

I was starting to get worried. I mean, Raph and Leo have been gone for almost three hours. Wouldn't you be worried?

I could tell Donny was getting a little worried too. I mean, he's in the lab most of the time, but I go to talk to him. When we'd be talking he'd keep looking at the clock.

Dude, I was about to go out there and try to find them myself!

Sensei told us about an argument him and Leo had before my bro took off. I'm willing to bet Raph went after him.

I hope they didn't run into trouble. I mean, sure Leo was alone when he was seriously hurt… But I don't think I could handle seeing both of my heroes hurt like that.

One was enough.

But where were they? They usually show up less than an hour after they storm out.

Now I got annoyed. I mean, they are being mean putting me in this kind of suspension!

I was to caught up in my thoughts to realize there were splashes of water outside, indicating foot steps.

I didn't realize it until the lair door busted open with a loud creak that only I could hear. I was the only one in the living room. Donny was in the lab still and Splinter was in his room.

If it were someone out to get us, I would get killed.

I was alone.

But then I saw, under the shadows, a green foot appear. I wouldn't take too much notice to it.

But I had to. On the foot was a splatter of blood. Dried blood.

Now, that's bad.

I realized that whichever one of my bros it was, they were carrying the other in their arms bridal style.

Another _but_ though.

The figure being held had katana hilts sticking out over his shoulders.

_No._ NO!

Raph stepped out with blood covering most of his upper body and some on his legs. I could tell none of it was his though. All Raph had were bruises.

Who was in his arms was what made tears begin to flow.

Raph clinged onto the cold and lifeless body of my eldest brother. Leo had many small, minor scrapes and bruises on his body, but what scared me was a wound under his collarbone. There was dry blood all over that area, indicating it bled a lot.

Seeing this, I did the only thing I thought I could do at the time besides being sick.

I screamed.


	6. Never the Same

Don POV

I was doing the usual.

You know, just typing away on my computer.

But then I heard a scream. I run out, fearing the worse.

I didn't expect this.

Mike was on his knees, his head was in his arms, and he was sobbing loudly.

I realized why, too.

Raph was there, halfway covered in blood, holding the dead body of Leonardo.

I felt myself fall down to my knees. Then I joined in with Mike in the crying.

My younger sibling came up to me and hugged me. We sat there crying on each other's shoulders. Then we heard Splinter's bedroom door open. I hear a loud gasp. I turn my head away from Mike's shoulder to see Sensei.

Splinter had a hand over his heart and tears were sliding down his cheeks. He hobbled over to Raph and my brother set Leo's body down. Sensei grabbed the corpse and cradled the head of my dead brother, crying.

"Raphael… What happened? D-did you et ambushed?" Splinter choked out, for he was still crying. A single tear fell down my brother's face.

"Y-yeah. Ambushed." Raph whispered. He had a hand on Leo's heart as if asking it to beat again. But noticed something and I crawled over to get a closer look at the wound.

"Raph… But this is a sai wound. See the indents on the sides? That means…" I started but was cut off by my hotheaded brother.

"So! The Foot got upgrades!" He yelled. But then, we all started to cry again. Even Raph. We all held part of the body, sobbing loudly.

Like it would matter.

My hero and big brother was dead.

Nothing was going to change that.


	7. Time Changed

Raph POV

It's been three weeks since I killed my brother.

I still look at the calendar and weep.

We didn't even celebrate. We didn't even remember. Of course, he'd always remember us, but he wouldn't pay to much attention to his own. Leo's… Leo _was_ selfless like that.

How could we forget he was turning 21!

Yup. That's right.

I killed Leo on his birthday.

I don't know how I can live like this! Without Leo…

It's hard.

I decided to do what Leo told me to do on his death day. I looked under his bed.

And man, am I an idiot.

I found four boxes, each labeled with our names. I took them all out, and decided to look at the one labeled with my name. Slowly, I took of the heavy duty tape keeping the thing closed. But I got it open. I looked in, and saw that there was a big black book, CDs and drawings.

Again, man am I an idiot!

I decided to look at the drawings first. There was one of us watching TV, and it was good. I never knew Leo could draw. I know that he said that during the whole argument with Sensei, but I didn't think he was this good at it. But then, I looked back at the box, and something caught my eye.

The title of the big black book.

It was called, _Leo Thoughts_.

I quickly put away the drawings and grabbed the journal. I flipped it open and a note fell out.

I decided to not read it yet. So I tucked the note back into the book and tucked the book itself into my belt. No way was it going anywhere. I pushed the box back under the bed, and decided on what to do with the other boxes.

After I had all three boxes held in my arms securely, I went to the Dojo. I know why too.

I wanted them to be in Leo's favorite place… At least I think.

"Umm…" I whispered. But then I raised my voice. "Mike! Don! Sensei! Can you guys come in the Dojo for a minute?" Then I see three tired figures walk in and I set the boxes down.

"W-why the presents, Raph?" Mike said. Yup. No more Raphie.

"They're not from me." I say. Don gives me a confused look.

"Then who're they from?" He says. For a genius, now I know to let the poor guy sleep. He sounds like he's gonna pass out!

"L-Leo…" I whisper. Tears well up in my family member's eyes. The all begin to open their boxes. Mike takes out a photo album and begins to look at pictures. Don takes out a small gadget and checks it over. Splinter takes out a few beautiful paintings and drawings. Then we all clinged onto our last gifts from Leo and wept. For hours.

After two hours, Don got up and left, holding the gadget as if it were the most precious thing in the world. Mike sat there, sobbing loudly, holding the photo album. Splinter left to his room with his art, crying. I decided to leave too. But I lied on the couch and soon fell asleep because of the quietness.

_Darkness. Only light in the darkness is a man, holding a weird looking staff._

"_You want change death, yes??" He said. He sounded very old._

"_Ummm… Yeah, but who are you?" I asked. This was kind of getting creepy._

"_Not matter. But me travel from different time. Sense someone make big mistake." The time wizard said. _

"_Yeah… My big bro…" I whispered. _

"_You want change? Me and can change, only little price." He answered._

"_Yes I want to change it. But what is the…" I didn't get to finish. Darkness._

I shot up from bed. Wait… _Bed??_

I fell asleep on the couch!! But then, suddenly, I felt the sudden need to look at the calendar.

After pouring myself a glass of water, I did. I nearly dropped my glass when I did though.

Why, you ask?

The date was a week before Leo died.


	8. Retrying

Raph POV

How did this happen?

A week? Wait a minute…

That one guy I met in my dream!

Is that possible?

I started to think that Mike forgot to mark the calendar for a while. In my mind, I was in pure denial.

Until I heard the familiar sound of swords 'swishing' through the air.

I went over to the Dojo to check it out. My eyes welled with tears.

Leo, _alive_ Leonardo, was there, doing katas.

But I saw he was distracted and sighted lines on his mask, indicating tears. Then I remembered this night.

Leo and Splinter got in a heated argument about how poor Leo's leadership skills are and how much of a failure he is. Don and Mike came to my room that night cuz they couldn't sleep with all the yells and cries of pain. I looked over his healthy and living body again and noticed something.

There were bruises and a few gashes across his skin. A couple of them stopped bleeding, but a few more were still bleeding although sluggishly. Good, not life threatening. I decided to open the door a little more to watch. It made a loud creak.

This clearly startled my brother, and he jumped.

Knocking one of the weapon's racks down, my bro looked at me. He had a large bruise, worse than all the others, on his cheek.

Leo hissed in pain as a shuriken fell and made a deep incision on his upper arm. It began to bleed heavily. I ran up to my brother and grabbed a towel from one of the towel racks we use in here after practice. I held the towel against the wound.

I knew it wasn't fatal also… Which was a total relief.

But he needed medical attention, possibly stitches. I looked up from the wound to my brother.

His blue eyes were sparkling, full of spirit once again, and looking at me. His lips were formed into something of a smile. I made a small smile back at 'im, and then looked out the Dojo's door to see Don's bedroom light on.

"I think Don's awake, bro. Let's have 'im check this out." I stated. Practically dragging him to our younger bro's room, we make it there. I creak the door open, very happy to see Don there, typing on the laptop he owns.

"Come in." Our younger sibling says, scaring me from the sudden noise out of the silence. I pull Leo in and Don gasps, pulling away the towel. He begins to dig around for his First Aid Kit. I watched in relief as he pulled it out, nothing else. But that didn't last long. He pulled out the equipment for stitches.

"Okay, Leo, this is gonna sting a bit." Don explains. He squeezes out some antibiotics and gently rubs it on the wound.

Although the touch is as soft as a feather, Leo bites his lip. After Don is done, our younger brother starts to stitch up the wound. Leo is still biting his lip, cuz of the pain. Then, finally, Donnie finished and bandaged it up. I sighed in relief.

"Kay, bro, just lay low for a while. It should heal up nicely in a week or two." Our bro said. I smiled and helped Leo up. He let out a cry of pain when he tried to move his arm. I looked to Donnie and he gave me a sad kind of look. He pulled out a needle.

Oh, yay.

We're gonna have a drugged Leo.

We gently guided our hurting bro to his room and laid him on his bed. I turned my head when Don stuck that needle in 'im. Our younger bro left and I stayed to make sure Leo was okay. He turned his head to me with his eyes squinted.

"You're no gonna 'eave? 'Re you?" He slurred. I resisted the laugh coming on at seeing him this crazy. But instead, I grabbed his hand.

"Never." I replied. Then he closed his eyes and fell asleep. 

I couldn't have ever been happier. I mean, with my brother,_ alive._ Sleeping there, flesh and blood, breathing. I looked at his form once again, and smiled.

There was no way I was gonna lose 'im again.


	9. Pain and Nightmares

Leo POV

It's been about three days since Raph was being all brotherly to me.

My arm still hurts like shell… Yesterday Don yelled at me for trying to practice just two days after getting the stitches. The first day after, I was out cold all day because of whatever Don put in that needle.

My brothers were asking questions about the bruise on my face. Yeah, it's definitely still sore. I picked out slivers from the wood that connected to my cheek. Splinter is starting to use one of his old walking sticks instead of the one he hit me with. Probably because my worthless blood was on the ends.

I mean I love my father… It's just… He's abusive to me. Physically and emotionally he beats me down.

The fourth day, I was finally allowed to practice. The only thing was, if my arm was hurting too much I'd have to stop. Also, I couldn't do the expert katas that I have grown to love.

We were sparring, and I was up against Mike. Everything was going normal. Except the fact that my younger sibling was going easy on me, like he was afraid to hurt me.

I was going in with a downward strike, when pain flared up my chest, settling underneath the left side of my collarbone. I cried out in pain, and held my hand at that spot. Falling to my knees, the pain was getting worse.

"DONNY!" Mike yelled. Don thought it was a joke at first looking at Mike with an aggravated look for interrupting his and Raph's match. Then his eyes widened in concern as he saw me whimpering in pain. Why wouldn't this STOP!?

Raph was frozen in place, for some reason. Probably because of the last few days he's been staring at the spot where the pain was. Did he do something to me? Was this 'brotherly' thing a distraction? I didn't realize that Don was trying to pull my hands away from the area.

"Leo! LET GO!" Don yelled. I pulled my hands back, trying to resist shooting my hands up again. My purple wearing brother set a warm, wet rag onto my pained spot, trying to soothe it.

After about an hour and fifteen minutes of them sitting there taking care of me, the pain finally subsided. I took deep breaths thankful that I could breathe without sharp pains running through my chest.

"W-what happened, Donny?" Mike asked. He gripped my hand and I just laid there the ground.

"I-I don't know…" Don replied. After sitting there a while longer, they took me to my room and made me stay there. I was so mad… Can't they see I'm fine after the incident?

But they made me stay in my room the rest of the day, and the whole next day. The only thing I got to do was eat, sleep, read and draw. Not much drawing though. I don't want them catching me.

The next day, I had one shell of a nightmare.

"You're so stubborn! I hate your personality, the way you get on my case even though I am trying to help you…Ya know what? I HATE YOU!" The red wearing turtle yelled. He lunged at me, and I couldn't hurt him. He is my brother. Raph hits me to the ground and pulled out his sais. He viciously stabs one into the left side of my collarbone. It switched scenes.

"N-never your f-fault…L-love all y-you. S-sorry…" I whispered, and then I couldn't breathe. But I didn't have a chance to even freak out. Darkness.

I shot up from my bed in a cold sweat. Taking in the sight of my own room and not Central Park, my breathing eventually slowed. I noticed something though. At my feet there was a wrapped gift with a card on it. Did someone actually remember my birthday?

Probably not.

But I opened it anyway. The card, I opened first. Inside, it said:

I love you and hope you have a good 21st birthday in a few days. I got you something nice. I'll give you the first part now, but you'll have to wait for the next. Anyways, Happy Early Birthday!

Expecting it to be from Mike, I took a look lower. My mouth gaped as I saw who it was from.

_Love ya bro._

Raphael 

I then grabbed the box and started to carefully unwrap it. I was surprised to see that a whole art set was there. How's he know?

But that question didn't matter. I smirked and hugged the set and card close to my body.

At least one brother understands me.


	10. Birthdays and Crying

Raph POV

Man, I really hope Leo will like his present. I spent most of my money on it.

Tomorrow is his birthday.

I have another one of those surprise chances; cuz Leo had another one of those "pains" today.

How does he get those pains? They're right where I stabbed him in my time.

Is this what that one guy meant by 'price'? Is Leo gonna remember everything?

I hope not. He'd never trust me near him ever again.

I can NEVER let that happen!

Okay… Leo fell asleep. Time to get it to him…

I grabbed my big wrapped gift and dragged it toward Leo's room. I set it next to him and left for a bit to grab a bite to eat.

When I came back, Leo was awake and looking at his present.

In the box, there was a guitar and a book with instructions. My bro smiled one of those mysterious smiles and hid the stuff I bought 'im. Then he fell to sleep.

I headed to my room to get some sleep of my own.

The next morning, Leo was allowed out of bed. Just not allowed to practice with us. He had to sit to the side, much to his disappointment.

After the final sparring match, me against Don, we were done. I won the match, and I went to go help Leo up. Once I went over there and reached my hand down, he did something I didn't expect him to EVER do.

He backed away.

In _fear._

Now, I'm pretty sure he knows.

But how?

I mean, it was a different time and all.

It didn't even happen here!

So, I walked away. I went to go eat breakfast with Mike and Don. Leo decided to throw a little fit, and run off to his room. Don't know what he's doin' in there.

Don't really _want _to know.

But, being as curious as I am, I went and did it.

I know I said this a lot so far, but MAN I'm an idiot!

I made it to his door and cracked it open a bit, and saw Leo laying on his bed with his face in his pillow. Probably sleeping.

I believed that until I heard a quiet sob come from 'im. I decided to use my stealth and walk in. I kneeled down and jumped as he turned his face to me.

"W-what do you want Raphael?" Leo said, wiping tears from his blood shot eyes.

"Why are you crying?"

"N-nothing." Leo whispered. I could tell he was hiding something.

"Leo, you wouldn't be sitting here cryin' your eyes out ova nothin'." I said, adding a little wink in da mix.

"They're just dreams Raphael…" Leo said. Why isn't he calling me Raph? Is he angry at me?

"About what?"

"Raph…" He whispered. Now, he uses my nickname!

"Tell me Leo! What was it about?!" I said in a loud whisper tone so that Dona and Mike can't hear.

"You were there, and… and you stabbed me. Right here." He said gesturing toward the left side of his collarbone. "Y-you told me you hated me… and you… you murdered me…"

NO!! HE REMEMBERS! OH GOD!!!!!

"Leo… Man… I need…" I started, but was cut off.

"Raph, no need to apologize. It was just a dream. It never happened." He said. I squeezed my eyes shut so much, that it hurt. I knew it was time. I gulped before I spoke in a quiet whisper.

"Look, Leo, I need to tell you something…"

A/N: Next up is the chapter: Confessions. Thanx for reading!


	11. Confessions

A/N: Probably the most awaited chapter… Hope you like it!!

Raph POV

I knew I started the conversation, but right now I total regret being here.

First, I had to see my brother cry. I hate seeing any of my brothers cry… But LEO cried. My big bro never cries.

Second, I had to argue with him, to tell me what's wrong. It may not seem like it, but sometimes I don't really _like_ to argue with Leo. Yeah, but remember… (For the sake of my reputation) I sometimes _do_ like fighting him.

Third, he had to tell me the dream. I already knew about it Leo! No need to remind me and get me almost crying!

Fourth, it came to this. Now I have to tell him. Everything. The fight with Sensei, the fight at Central Park, his death and the time wizard. I took a deep breath, and looked at my brother.

He kind of looked different right now. I mean, he still looked like the slim and muscled figure everyone knows him as… But right now, his beautiful, sapphire eyes were sparkling with not a death glare, but an afraid look. He didn't want to hear what I had to say. I guess we'll both just have to bear.

"Raph? You okay? You just froze up there. Is there something wrong?" Leo told him. Oh god, Leo, you have no idea.

"Leo…I-I knew…"

"Raph? Knew what?"

"Your dreams…"

"What? How could you? I haven't even told anyone about them! Not even Sensei!"

"Leo… Let me tell my story." I replied. Tears were starting to force their way out of my eyes. He nodded in agreement.

"Okay. Tell me what you have to say, Raphael." He told me. I took a deep breath and felt a tear roll down my cheek. Leo, being the big brother, wiped it away and gave me a sad smile.

"L-Leo, okay… I'm not exactly… from this time." I revealed. Leo's eyes went wide and he took his hand away from my cheek.

"W-what's that supposed to mean?" He asked.

"I was brought here, from a time wizard. In my time, I made a huge mistake and I came here to fix it. Make life good again."

"W-what was the mistake?" Leo asked, curious.

"I-I killed him…" I admitted. More tears snaked down my cheeks.

"W-who?" Leo questioned. I took a deep breath.

"I killed you, Leo, in my time…" I choked out. His eyes widened even further, if that was possible, and he started to back away from me. "Leo, I'm sorry. I just want to help you. I don't want you to die." I whispered. But I didn't expect what came next. He pushed me away from his bed and sent me on the ground, sprawled. But what I hated more, is what he said next. Or should I say, _confessed_ next.

"Look, Raph, or whoever you are! Quit trying to help! You killed me once, and you could always end up doing it again! You know what Raphael? What if I never _wanted _to be saved!"


	12. Hidden Evil

Somewhere in New York 

"Most interesting." Bishop remarked as he looked at his cameras that were set up in the turtle's lair.

"A time wizard? That's impossible Mr. Bishop!" Stockman yelled out. It was scientifically not possible! The red clad turtle must be lying.

"Impossible? I believe people would think of what… I really am impossible. So a time wizard is not possible when I am living proof right here that bizarre things can happen." Bishop hissed. He hated it when his assistants think he is wrong.

"I am…sorry Mr. Bishop. How will we get our hands on this wizard, however?" The curious professor asked.

"The only way for us to get our hands on this new discovery… is killing Leonardo. That shall bring this wizard to our world and his power will be ours. We can experiment on it as much as we wish." Bishop planned. Stockman smirked. This plan might just work.

"Alright Bishop. I will send out all of my tech ninjas…" Stockman started, but was cut off.

"No. I want you, Dr. Stockman, to go and take care of him yourself. Prove to me, you are a worthy lab assistant." Bishop told. Stockman nodded and began to set up an exo-suit for himself, for he has no battle experience whatsoever. Once Stockman left, Bishop looked to the shadows. A young women, roughly at the age 20 or 21 walked out. She had a battle suit on and had two katanas sheathed on her back.

"Will he be taking care of the turtle you set me to take care of, Master Bishop?" She asked, her voice soft.

"Sukei… I have only been training you if anything happens to him. You are, after all, my daughter." Bishop reminded her. Her piercing, silver looking eyes narrowed and she pushed some soft, wavy black hair away from her brow.

"Yes, father." Sukei whispered, sadly. She didn't know why, but once Bishop shown a picture of the blue wearing turtle, she felt butterflies rise in her stomach. The young woman didn't want the turtle to perish. She wanted to meet him and find out what those feelings meant.

Sukei walked away, and made her way to her room in the large laboratory. She hugged a pillow close to her slim body and sighed. Why was this turtle confusing her so much? She let go of the pillow, and grabbed her sketch book. Sukei began the starting lines of a picture of the blue wearing ninja.

Once the beginnings of the face were started, the feeling of her stomach doing flip flops returned. Sukei decided to set the book down, for she didn't like the feeling she was getting. She threw her pillow against the wall in confusion and anger.

Why was life so hard?

A/N: This chapter is supposed to be short. I added a new character. Bishop's daughter, Sukei, is kind of like Karai, because he found her as an orphan. Just wanted to tell the background of that. 

Oh, no! It's getting closer to the end!!!

Don't believe I'm letting our little green friends off, THAT easily…


	13. Safety and Hatred

Raph POV

What? Not want to be saved?

Wasn't my job to come here and save him? I turned to look at Leo.

"W-what?" I stuttered. His blue eyes were shining with unshed tears.

"I don't need your help Raphael! Just… Leave me alone!" Leo yelled, taking a mad dash towards the door. I ran to catch up with him, but was too late. He was gone, in the dark tunnels of the sewer.

I used my tracking senses, which Leo's are WAY better, but mine will still work. I ran towards the way I though of him to go. There were still faint noises of water splashing, so I should be catching up to him. I heard the distant 'clank' of a sewer cover being removed and another of it being put back on. He's topside.

Crap.

He will be faster than me, so if I don't pick up my pace, then I won't know which way he went. I run up to the ladder I thought I heard him go up and opened the manhole cover. I took in the sweet scent of the outside world, before taking off. 

I found him a few rooftops away, and man, I've never seen him so upset. There were tears going down his cheeks and Leo's eyes were bloodshot from crying.

I messed big time.

Again.

Finally, he stops, collapsing to his knees. I can hear Leo's sobs from a few rooftops away. Finally, I make it over to him and reach my hand out to lay it on his shoulder. I jumped as he turned to face me.

"Go away, Raph." He whispered coldly. That stupid- Wait. T-this was how our argument started in my time… No. I can't let him die.

No.

He tried to get up and get away from me in my thoughtful state, but I pulled him down so he was sitting beside me. We hung our legs over the edge of the rooftop, looking over the lights of the city. Leo opened his mouth to say something, but I cut him off.

"Leo, don't try anything. From what I told you, I'd think you'd know that I won't let you run again." I told him. He closed his mouth and pressed his lips into a tight line.

"Look, Raph… Let me go _**now**_ or else the Foot is going to find a dead turtle on this rooftop!" Leo yelled. He tried to pull away again, but I still had a tight grip on him. I wasn't really paying a mind to that, though.

Leo _threatened_ me.

I thought he only did that to enemies… Wait.

D-does Leo think of me as an enemy now? I know he would have total rights to, after what I told him… So I almost did it.

I had my arm unwrapped away from him about half way, when a laser was shot at us.

Not just any laser either.

This laser was from an exo suit that none other than Baxter Stockman could have created. Great. We get to have a fight with _somebody._

"And I thought the red clad turtle was supposed to have a heart harder than diamond. I guess my spies didn't tell me the whole truth." Stockman sneered. I was about ready to go after him, when Leo pulled my arm. My bro reached to his back, only to find no katanas.

Crap.

I reached down, myself, and found my sais in their place in my belt.

Good.

At least I have my weapon. Leo nodded, signaling that it was okay now. I realized that he was holding something in his hands. But what?

When he jumped towards Stockman, I saw a glint of metal and the blue of a dragon on a hilt. Leo grabbed his pocketknives.

How clever.

I chose then to charge, too. Leo managed to get Stockman lying down. He was about to dig a knife into the exo suit, his eyes suddenly got wide and he jumped off of the mad scientist. Leo an up to me, and pushed me to the ground. I heard the sound of a laser going off, and my brother cry out. He got off of me, and pulled his leg up to chest and winced.

On his leg, there was a hole in his green flesh and it was bleeding pretty badly. I decided it was time to defend my brother like he did for me many times in my life. I stood in front of Leo, protectively. He gave me a loving smile and then put pressure on his wound with an elbow pad.

Stockman grinned mischievously. I gave him confused look, before hearing the shot of a gun. The only thing weird though, that instead of a crack, the gun made a click noise.

I last heard Leo calling my name and someone shaking me before my world faded into darkness.

A/N: Whew! Three pages! Oh, and just letting you people know. In this story, Dr. Stockman is a human. Thanx for the reviews!!


	14. Possessed

A/N: Okkkaaayyy… This chapter is going to have more than one POV. This is another important chapter! Like I said, it is nearing the end!!

Leo POV

Oh god it hurt.

I couldn't move without a painful twinge of pain shooting up in my leg like lightning bolts.

The blood wouldn't stop oozing out of the hole in my leg. He must have switched it to bullets when he shot me, because there is an actual hole in my leg, not a burn. It was bigger than I expected too, I think the bullet hit my muscles.

I look up to Stockman and see him switching the gun again. This time, it looks to be darts that fill the round. My eyes widen as Raph begins to stand in front of me.

A faint 'click' fills the air and Raph's hands reach over and grab his chest. NO!

"Raph!! Raph, no!" I yell. He can't leave me! But he drops to the ground like a brick. Stockman begins to laugh and I turn to him, giving him a death glare. "What did you do to him!?"

"Oh, I did _something._ You'll find out in a few seconds." He sneered. My eyes went narrower, if possible. I pulled myself over to Raph's still body and held him up to me. I caressed his cheek, and was sorry for being so cold with him. Stockman laughed harder as Raph jerked in my arms. I-is he convulsing? Suddenly, his eyes opened and his eyes weren't their normal shade of chocolate brown. A glowing, angry red was illuminating from his usually brown orbs. I backed away, knowing something was going to happen.

"R-Raph?" I whispered. This isn't the Raph that I met not too long ago!! He turned to me and delivered me an evil smirk. What did Stockman do??

"He won't be able to hear you. Your brother is under _my_ control now! It will only be a matter of time until _he_ shows up…" Stockman said, muttering the last part at a barely audible level. But I have higher senses than any of my brothers, and sensitive hearing counts as one of them. Did he mean Raph? Reinforcements? Something else? What ever 'he' was, I didn't exactly want it right now! Raph flew up out of my grip and was standing. He kicked me in the plastron. I winced as my leg moved. The torn flesh pulled, and it was bleeding heavier. The world was starting to fuzz.

"Raph! Snap out of it!" I shouted, but he kicked me again, as if he never heard me. Now I think there was a waterfall of blood out of my leg. I shook off the dizziness that threatened to take me. No way was I going to let Raph's body be toyed with. Suddenly, I was on my back with him over me, I was breathing _way _too hard.

Then Raph pulls out his sais.

No.

Not again!!

But a sai gets plunged deep into the same spot. It hurts so badly! Every time I let out or even breathed in a shaky breath, it felt like my lungs were going to explode! I felt something warm and sticky dribble out of my mouth. The world grows dark and all I can hear is Stockman laughing…

Raph POV

Darkness. Pure, welcoming darkness.

Where's Leo? I wouldn't know. All I can see is the darkness surrounding me.

Light starts to form at one side of the room. Blood red, forming in a circle. I hear a faint buzzing and I jump away from there.

A red beam goes right where I was standing. I hear Stockman laughing. How did he get in my mind? Did it have anything to do with what he did to me moments ago? The mad doctor starts to shoot beams at me and after a while of dodging, I'm cornered.

"You're finished _beast_…" I am about to charge then another friendly light illuminates the room. I look behind Stockman to see the old time wizard, holding his staff. The only thing different though, is that he looked furious. He shot a blue beam towards Stockman and he cries out. Suddenly, it's just the wizard and me. He floats up to me, with the angry expression still plastered on his face.

"_Raphael! _I gave you a chance and you waste? Selfish!" The angry time traveler shouted. He sounded way angrier than he looked.

"Whoa, man! What did I do?" I question. His face softens for a second, then gets back to anger.

"You did again! He gone!" He yells. Does he mean?… Leo's dead out there? But wait, he said I kill 'im!

"I've been in here the whole time! I didn't do anything!" I shouted back. He waves his staff and a blue circle shows in the air. In it, it showed Leo lying there with a sai sticking out of his chest. No! Tears gather in my eyes as I notice he is not breathing and there is blood seeping out of his mouth. Only one tear makes it out of my eyes.

"I will leave you here, young one, to look upon what you have caused this day." He says, disappearing. I am alone, with a blue circle in the room. Suddenly, I feel my sai itch my side. I look over, teary eyed and pull it out of my belt. I point it towards my throat.

"Leo, I'm sorry for doing this to you. I hope you can accept my apology. I will see you in moments, brother." I whisper. I begin to bring it towards my neck and it is about an inch away when a familiar voice shouts.

"_Raphael_! _Stop_!"

A green hand pulls my sai from reach.


	15. Ghost of the Past

A/N: Weep weep Cry cry This is the second to last chapter!! I'm sad!

Raph POV

My life was going to end… Just like I killed both of my bros from my time and here. I deserved it.

After all that I did, I was finally going to rid the world of me. Anyways, they say that if you die in your mind you die in real life. Only one pull of the sai and the world would be ridden of me. I pulled it the last few inches. I expected pain that I have never felt before, but nothing. I hear someone shout my name than nothing. Did I die?

I open my eyes to see a green hand holding the sharp weapon away from me. I look up, and my breath hitches.

Looking at me with those strong, powerful eyes was Leo.

Not only was it _Leo_, but _my_ Leo. From my time. My eyes tear up as his chest isn't even rising or falling.

"God, Raph. You owe me one. You can be a real idiot sometimes, little brother." Leo says. My brother offers me a small smile and I hook myself onto him. I cry into his shoulder, and he just sits there and rubs my forehead with his cold thumb. I finally calmed down enough to talk to him.

"Oh god I missed you bro…" I choked out. Leo squeezed me tighter and I felt my own shoulder get a little damp.

" I missed you too, Raphael." Leo said. We sat there, crying on each other's shoulders for what seemed like a lifetime. Finally, he pulled away and looked at me. He wiped my tears and then wiped his own. I knew he was waiting for me to talk, and I asked something that has been on my mind lately.

"L-Leo… Do you s-still love m-me?" I asked, taking shallow breaths. More tears came to my eyes. Leo grabbed my shoulders and I looked at his sapphire eyes. He gave me the Leo look, and I knew what ever he said next meant business.

"Raph… I will never stop loving you. Whether you like it or not, I will." Leo snuggled me close and now I could tell he was holding back tears.

"B-but I k-killed you!!" I cried.

"Raphael! It was a mistake, and you learned from it."

"B-but you're d-dead…" I whispered.

"Raph, from this happening we both have learned lessons. I have learned not to judge any one of brothers and to not hide myself from the world. You have learned that anger can get the best of you, and you need to control it. I was glad, little brother."

"W-why were you g-glad?" I questioned. My voice was shaky from all the crying.

"If you didn't come after me the way you did, it would have happened to Don or Mikey instead. I couldn't think of that happening to them. I knew the firsts would be me or you." He replied. I suddenly felt better about this. I don't know why, either. I stood up from his hug and helped my deceased brother up.

"Leo… What about the other Leo? Is there a way to save him?" I asked. He looked down to me and nodded. "How?"

"First, we need to defeat Stockman for good. Then I can heal him. I won't be able to heal the leg though." Leo replied. I sighed.

"Let's do it." I tell Leo. He nods, and a gold portal opens.

"Ready?" He asks.

"More ready than I'll ever be." I reply. We both take a step forward and I blink my eyes. The sight I was greeted with was the rooftop. I saw Ghost Leo standing beside me. I pull out my sais. Over to the edge of the building, Stockman was staring wide eyed at us.

"B-But how?" He questioned. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Magic." I reply with sarcasm hanging on my tone of voice. He begins to shoot, but I am too fast. Leo jumps forward and plunges a katana into his exo suit. Leo turns to me and I nod. We both jump and kick him off the edge of the very tall building. I finally hear a crash and Stockman's scream dies out. I climb down the fire escape and look I check the pulse.

None.

I bow my head to him, and climb back up. Leo was already working on bringing the other back to life. His hands were glowing and he kept on waving them over his wound and head. Suddenly, the large hole in the body's chest was fading away. Soon, it was all the way gone and Leo was even breathing again! But Ghost Leo looked exhausted.

"He'll wake up in ten minutes." Ghost Leo informed me. I walked over and hugged my deceased brother tight.

"You can go now…" I whisper, my eyes tearing up. Ghost Leo hugged me tighter.

"I love you Raphael." He says, softly.

"Oh God, I love you Leonardo…" I say. We finally let each other go and I wipe the tears in my eyes. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too, little brother." Ghost Leo said. We sat and looked into each other's eyes for a bit.

While I almost have a black color in my eyes, Leo has the beautiful glistening of sapphire. When you look at him, you think that you are looking at two of the gems. Sure I will have another Leo, but his eyes would never look the same as my Leo's.

Then another portal opened. Ghost Leo gave me a sad look before turning toward the golden thing. He gave me small wave, then stepped through. I made a small smile.

My brother didn't hate me.

Leo started to stir, and I went over to him. I noticed that his hands flew right to his leg. It must've been hurtin' him. I walked over and helped him up. I started to slowly take him with me, in the direction of home.

"R-Raph?" He rasped once he was once again conscious.

"It's me, Leo. You're going to be okay. I'm gonna get you home and Don is going to fix that leg up of yours." I assured. He mumbled something. "What was that?"

"Thanks…" Leo whispered. I smiled. We were almost home, and I could tell he was hurting.

"No problem bro." We walked quietly into the lair and I made it up to Don's lab and had Leo sit on the table. "I'll go get Don. Don't move." I made my way to my little bro's room and went in. Luckily, he was awake again.

"Yeah Raph?" He asked.

"Ummm… I am, but Leo has a nasty gunshot on his leg. You should check it out. He's in the lab." I informed. Don and I went to the lab and my smart bro grabbed a whole crap load of medical equipment.

After about an hour of working on Leo's leg, Don was finished. Then he told me about the injury.

"Okay, I had to stitch the wound, but the bullet managed to scrape against some muscles in his leg. I fixed it the best I could, and now we will see the outcome." Don told me.

I sighed.

I hoped that whatever the outcome…

I'd still have Leo.


	16. Strawberries

A/N: I'm sorry, but this is the last chapter to this story!! Soooorrrryyyyy!!!

Raph POV

It's been a few months since the incident with Stockman.

Leo has fully healed, except for one thing.

When he walks, just to remind me of what happened, he walks with a painful limp.

But now he trains with us again and can move on his own. When he came home, he couldn't even get out of his bed for a whole week and a half.

Everyone keeps asking us what happened that night. Every time they ask, Leo looks at me and I smile. It's our secret now. We made up a story about an ordinary fight with a couple of thugs.

I know that I have _a_ Leo, but I can't help but miss my real big brother. My family doesn't even know about me not even being from this time!

These thoughts brought me upon the journal that I brought here my real time that my Leonardo wrote in. Is there something important in there that he wanted me to know?

So I decided to look through it.

Once I opened it, the same piece of paper fell out.

Instead of reading t he journal first, I decided to read the letter.

I took a few deep breaths, then unfolded the piece of paper and began to read. I smiled once I saw Leo's familiar handwriting.

Out of all of us, Leo always had the best handwriting. Mike's was sloppy, because he didn't write much, mine was just messy, and Don's was fast and shaky because he always took notes… But Leo's is perfectly graced. It went from his drawings, journal, maps and plans he wrote out for us. He _had_ to write neat so we could read it.

I let those thoughts go by, and then continued reading.

In big letters in a fancy cursive it read _To My Little Brother Raphael._

_I know I may have pressured you, but I didn't mean it as a bossy older brother. I wanted you to know that I cared about you. So all the nagging and lectures wasn't me being a jerk, I just didn't want you to get hurt. I love you Raph, and if you're reading this, something either happened to me or you are raiding my personal stuff. _

_I found a poem the other day, and it kind of reminded me of you. __My Brother:__   
__in my darkest hour,   
thou were there to shine light,  
when I had fallen,  
with firm grasp,  
thou hast raised my calling._

My Brother:  
When I had sunk in deep gloom,  
thou was there with words,  
when silent voice cried,  
your reach did extend,  
changing all the lies.

My Brother:  
When iniquity filled with shame,  
thou took my place,  
sacrificed thy conceit,  
bestowed thine honour,   
washing dirt from upon thy feet.

My Brother:  
How shalt thy repay,  
such unpardonable debt that thine owes,  
a blood's bath smothered  
my Brother's love shown,  
in gratitude, I humbly, acknowledge my Brother.

_I love you Raphael…I hope you know that._

I thought I was done reading, and was in tears after reading the poem. Then I saw a few words at the bottom.

P.S. If you are going to make me an altar thingy, make sure you DO NOT put strawberries!! I'm allergic!

I laughed at the last part, although then I remembered a time not to long ago after we had strawberries with breakfast. You see, Mike is a strawberry fanatic!

FLASHBACK

After a delicious meal of pasta and afterwards a dessert of strawberries dipped in chocolate. Right when we finished, Leo went straight to his room and shut his door. He always does this after we have this dessert!

Now, I was curious. So I snuck up to the door and opened it only a crack of the way. I saw his face swelling! No seriously, SWELLING! He took a shot thing and laid down on his bed and quickly fell asleep.

WOW! Leo's allergic to Mike's special dessert!!

END FLASHBACK

I held the note tightly, and then tucked it in between two pages of the journal. 

Now's not the time to read it either.

I set it down on my bed and made my way to Leo's room. I saw him tossing and turning in bed. I sat at the edge, and he quickly woke up. He was breathing harshly, and I rubbed his arm to make him calm down.

"R-Raph?" He rasped. I looked at him and his eyes were wide in fear.

"It was that dream again… Wasn't it?" I asked. He nodded and curled up.

"I mean, I know it wasn't really you, but in my mind it is you! It confuses me!" He said. I laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Bro, it's all right. We both know that I won't make that mistake ever again." I told him. He sighed and pulled back the covers, inviting me to join him. "Sure. Why not?"

I remembered that tonight we had more of those strawberry desserts, and Leo didn't have any because he turned in early. So I was a bit umm… Loopy.

I curled up against my big brother and felt his wide grin against my shoulder. He fell asleep pretty fast, leaving me to think about my real Leo and everything that has happened in my life recently.

About an hour went by and I started to feel tired. Finally!

I was way too hyped up on sugar to get any sleep. I smiled and soon fell into a pretty great slumber.

Oh, the things strawberries can do to ya.

FIN

Rest in peace my brother you did not die in vain 

_Rest in peace my brother though we do not all know each other we all share a common pain  
Rest in peace my brother though they protest us one day they will understand _

_  
Rest in peace my brother the people that you fought for will remember you always _

_  
Rest in peace my brother the world will miss you so _

_  
Rest in peace my brother we will always keep your memory alive _

_  
Rest in peace my brother and do not worry we will finish the mission with you in our hearts. _

_  
Rest in peace my brother we will carry you in our hearts for the rest of our lives _

_  
Rest in peace now brother for you will not be forgotten_


End file.
